Fan Mail
by DrawMeASheep
Summary: The team gets some thank you notes after visiting an elementary school on Career Day.


Disclaimer: Instead of disclaiming, I'm going to put in a declaimer this time. That's basically going to be a disclaimer with bombast, and since this section has already gone on too long, I'll let you use your wonderful imaginative powers to dream it up. Start with the phrase, "Friends, Romans, countrymen…" and work from there.

Spoilers: Nothing in particular.

Summary: The gang feels the repercussions of a Career Day appearance at a school full of little Marinelings. I'm not sure of the proper moniker for children of Marines, and I liked the ring of Marinelings as compared to Marinelets.

* * *

Gibbs sipped his coffee as he stepped out of the elevator. He was pleased to see his entire team seated at their respective computers, looking busy. He nodded to each in turn and sat at his own desk. A thick manila envelope on his blotter drew his immediate attention. Glancing at the labels, he saw it was addressed to 'Our Special Friends at NCIS.' "Looks like we got something from those first-graders at Russell Elementary."

Tony rolled his eyes, walking over to Gibbs' desk to see what was in the envelope. "And here I was thinking Career Day was just a total waste of time!"

"I thought the children were unusually receptive to everything we told them," Ziva said, giving Tony a pinch on the arm.

He made a noise and recoiled in an over dramatized response. "Yeah, well, if anything, I'd have thought they learned that 'Stranger Danger' meant staying away from you and your stealth ninja moves. I can't believe the school allowed you to do a knife throwing demonstration."

McGee stood and joined Tony and Ziva in front of Gibbs' desk. "You know, they really seemed to like it when she showed them where to bite an attacker's hand to make him let go, too."

"Always play to your assets, McGee," Gibbs said, opening the envelope and removing a stack of colored construction paper cards. "Is it me or did the auditorium not look this full?"

"They're little. You were probably counting by normal sized people, but one kid only counts for a third of a person. Plus, there were probably a bunch of them burrowing underground, just out of sight."

Gibbs ignored Tony and opened the first card, which was illustrated with a group of stick people holding black rocks, and read, "'Dear NCIS, Thank you for coming to talk to us about catching bad people. My favorite was when you showed us the movie about getting away from fires.' Did we have a video presentation?"

"No, but that kid's gonna be really disappointed when he tries to join NCIS based on his superior stop, drop and roll skills." Tony picked up a card with two people and a horse on the front. "This kid even drew Ducky's bowtie. Let's see what the rugrat has to say about our medical examiner. 'I did not know that dead people need doctors, so I am glad that someone helps them. Also, Agent Ziva and Dr. Ducky talked funny, kind of like my Nana. She is from another place where she used to have a pony. People who talk like them make me think of ponies.' Of course, that begs the question why a person would leave a country full of ponies to come to a country with no ponies." He looked around expectantly. "C'mon, _Seinfeld_?" When no one acknowledged him, he continued, "Has anyone ever considered that we're kind of like the cast of _Seinfeld_?"

"Yes, I often think of you as the spastic one with bad hair, Tony." Ziva picked up a card with a computer and a smiling man in a colorful outfit on the front. "'Agent McGee was really smart about computers. I bet he could show me how to play Gran Turismo really good.' You made an impression, McGee, although I can't say I remember you wearing this orange and yellow suit."

"They're six. I guess we have to give them some artistic license." McGee held up a purple card with what was clearly a picture of Abby, complete with pigtails and skull t-shirt, on the front. "We'll have to send this one down to the lab. Listen, 'Abby the science lady was the best part. She made science sound really really fun. My daddy does science, but I think he does it wrong because it does not sound fun when he talks about it.'"

"Wow."

"Finding all of this touching, Tony?"

"No, Zee-vah. I'm just astounded by how dumb little kids are. Like this, 'Agent Gibbs was cool because he is a Marine and my dad is a Marine and my mom is a Marine and I want to be a Marine when I grow up.' I mean, come on." He tried to backtrack as he saw the look Gibbs was giving him, "Oh, not that it's bad to be a Marine, boss…I was just, uh, commenting on the lack of creativity in the, uh, sentence, uh…"

"Structure?" McGee provided.

"Yeah, structure. And anyway, did any of these kids even notice I was there?"

"I think this one's about you," McGee said, reading, "'I liked all the special agents except the boring one who talked about being safe around cars. I think they should just call him an agent instead of a special agent because he did not seem very special to me.'"

"Hey, I was trying to warn them about these two," Tony retorted, pointing at Ziva and Gibbs. "And that can't be the only one that mentions me."

"This one did," Ziva said through her laughter, holding up a card with a frowning man in a chair surrounded by laughing people. "'I liked it when Agent DiBozo got stuck in the handcuffs but Agent Ziva got out of them really fast and laughed at him and told us we could laugh at him too. I learned that laughing helps you get out of handcuffs.' See? You should be proud. You helped them learn."

He yanked the card from her hand and rapidly scanned the large block lettering. "It does not say 'Agent Bozo.'"

"No, I heard 'Agent _Di_Bozo.' DiBozo," McGee said, looking over Tony's shoulder. "See, right there. Agent DiBozo."

Gibbs shook his head as he reached to answer his ringing phone. "From the mouths of babes, as they say."

"More like crayons," Tony muttered, continuing to search through the pile of cards.


End file.
